Politeness pays: how natural language gets better AI responses

Elton Boocock
Elton Boocock

Elton Boocock, founder of Thinkivity – which provides AI consultancy and training exclusively for the UK glazing industry – looks at why manners matter, even if you’re instructing AI.

AI is changing the way we work, but how do we talk to it? Should we be issuing robotic commands, or can we just chat naturally?

If you’ve ever hesitated before typing a request, unsure if you need to ‘speak AI,’ you’re not alone. The good news is that you don’t need to overthink it. AI understands human language better than you might expect, and the way you phrase your request can make all the difference.

Have you ever seen someone try to talk to AI like they’re programming an old-school fax machine? I bet it wasn’t you, of course! But we humans have a funny habit of stripping all the personality out of our AI requests, breaking them down into some weird, robotic command, like: “Generate email. Subject: Discount. Tone: friendly.”

It’s as if we think AI needs to be spoken to in some secret code. But here’s the thing; AI isn’t a machine you have to ‘hack.’ It’s designed to understand natural language. The more you talk to it like a human, the better it responds. AI understands conversations, much better than commands.

I was delivering AI training recently, and one of the biggest lightbulb moments (and there were a lot that day) was this: “You just talk to it like it’s another human!”.

Now, I’m not saying AI has feelings (at least, not yet!). It doesn’t care if you say “please” or “thank you.” But you should. Because when you use manners, you naturally frame your request in a way that makes more sense to both you and the AI.

When you say, “Please write a short, engaging email about our new energy-efficient windows,” you’re not just being polite. You’re forcing yourself to be clearer and more natural. And AI thrives on clarity.

A lot of people overthink AI, as if it requires some special formula to work properly. They shorten their requests, strip out any personality, and end up making things harder for themselves.

But here’s the secret: AI was trained on real human conversations. So, the best way to get great responses is to speak to it naturally.

The biggest mistake is trying to guess what the AI wants rather than just saying what you want. People assume they need to phrase things in some unnatural, overly structured way, when that just makes AI’s job harder.

So, instead of using a clunky command like “Generate customer reply. Positive tone. Confirm appointment”, just say “Can you help me write a friendly email confirming a customer’s appointment and letting them know we’re looking forward to it?”

One sounds like you’re speaking to a robot. The other sounds like… well, you.

Talk to your AI the same way you talk to people. With most tools now offering voice input, why not skip the keyboard and just speak? You might find it easier to sound natural when talking aloud rather than typing. Once you get used to it, you can bring that same conversational style to the keyboard – making your AI interactions smoother and more intuitive.

AI isn’t perfect. It reflects what you give it. If you treat it like a machine, it’ll give you machine-like responses. If you speak to it like a human, you’ll get human-sounding results.

Next time you’re about to type a request, ask yourself: Would I say this out loud to a person? If the answer is no, rewrite it. Not for AI’s sake – but for yours.

If you found this helpful, thank you! You’re very welcome.